These obscene, exhibitionist trees
With their pollen and seasonal sleaze
You might think I’m a prude
But it’s quite blooming rude
How their lovemaking’s making me sneeze
Author: Stephen Bobbett
Super Metroid
There was a space pirate named Ridley
Whose fight was a pain-riddled medley
My missile barrage
Was to him a massage
And my plasma beams didn’t do diddly
Seasons
I moved to New England for seasons
So it seems like a spiritual treason
To feel stuck like a magnet
So frigid and stagnant
And longing for more arid regions
Crab Cowboy
Some day you wake up and you just need to draw a crab with a little cowboy hat and a lasso.
Credit to my friend Daedlogistics for getting these parody lyrics to Bon Jovi’s “Wanted Dead or Alive” stuck in my head while I was streaming the drawing process:
I’m Crab Cowboy / On a seahorse I ride / I’m wanted / Buttered and fried
Earth is the Worst, No. 25
From the Earth is the Worst webcomic series I briefly published through the pandemic, 2020-2021.